A Real Conversation with God? Is It Possible?

What if you could sit down beside a cozy campfire and have a normal, intimate, transformational conversation with God?

In the opening minutes of the movie, The Art of Racing in the Rain, the camera pans down a darkened hallway of a cozy home. An aged golden retriever named Enzo lies sadly at the front door. Enzo’s soulful eyes search longingly as he speaks through actor Kevin Kostner’s voice:

“Gestures are all that I have; sometimes they must be grand in nature. And while I occasionally step over the line and into the world of the melodramatic, it is what I must do in order to communicate clearly and effectively. In order to make my point understood without question. I have no words I can rely on because, much to my dismay, my tongue was designed long and flat and loose, and therefore, is a horribly ineffective tool for pushing food around my mouth while chewing, and an even less effective tool for making clever and complicated polysyllabic sounds that can be linked together to form sentences. And that’s why I’m here now waiting for Denny to come home—he should be here soon—lying on the cool tiles of the kitchen floor in a puddle of my own urine.”

How God Is Transforming My Life Through Conversations with Him

I usually journal my conversations with God on my computer. That helps me to focus, and it creates a searchable written record for later reference. I password-protect my file in Microsoft Word for privacy.

Below are four ways God is transforming me and my relationship with Him through back-and-forth conversation:

1. The most significant way God has transformed me through conversations with Him is that I’ve become much more confident that God loves ME as His uniquely created child.

Yes, God loves ME. Not just that God loves the whole world (John 3:16)—which is true but sounds so generic—but God knows and loves ME, as His intimately known and fully loved daughter. He loves spending time with ME, and He’s always available because, being God, He can be completely present with everyone on the planet at the same time.

When I hear God tell me deeply meaningful things about why and how He loves me for who I am and not just for what I do, and I feel the Holy Spirit’s powerful confirmation that His words are true—wow, that’s transformational!

2. When I confess my sins to God, I actually look forward to talking with Him about it!

Before I started talking conversationally with God, and I confessed my sin, I would feel forgiven, most of the time. But afterward, I still felt awkward with Him for a few days, thinking I somehow had to prove my worthiness again before I could feel close to Him again. Especially after confessing recurring sin, I rarely felt like I knew how not to commit the same sin again.

Now, after I confess, I ask Him what He wants to say to me. Sometimes, He just says, “You’re forgiven. Move on.” I never heard that before I started talking conversationally with Him.

Sometimes, though, He says, “Let’s talk about why you do that sin.” The first time I heard that question, I dreaded the conversation. But then, He encouraged me and told me He wants what I want—to overcome that sin for a more joyful life and fruitful calling. So I talk about how I feel about the sin, what led up to it, and why I think I did it. He often adds additional insight, stuff that I would never have thought of myself. And then He tells me good things about myself that will help me to change the sinful behavior.

Some of my most personally satisfying times with God have been conversations about my sin! I hear how much He loves me. He heals my sinful motives. I become stronger against temptation. My love and trust in Him grow so much stronger.

3. My thanksgiving and praise are so much sweeter now!

I have such a richer sense of praise and thanksgiving through back-and-forth conversations with God, because of my richer relationship with Him. I’m much more aware of His blessings, and most of all, His precious love. Praise and thanksgiving are no longer mainly disciplines, but genuine outpourings of my heart.

Praying for others is much richer.

When I pray conversationally for loved ones, especially my husband, I ask God what He loves about the people I’m praying for. I enjoy hearing His love for His children, especially when I pray for my husband.

Often, when I pray for loved ones who are facing serious issues—i.e. when cardiologists performed two procedures on my husband’s heart—God and I talk through my fears about what could happen. It’s hard to talk with Him about fears, but when I do, I sense His love and strength.

4. I’m gaining more clarity, confidence, and courage to l become who God created me to be and do what He created me to do.

The more back-and-forth conversations I have with God, the more I know, deep in my soul, that God really does love ME. And He calls ME to do His uniquely designed purpose in His Kingdom. I’m very confident in that now, because I’ve heard Him declare that to me, in ways that I would never have thought of myself, and in ways that are much too personal to tell you!

Is Talking Conversationally with God Biblical?

Following Jesus

“Following Jesus is not about doing the right things: it’s about doing things together.” (Tony Stoltzfus)

When I first read this statement, I thought, “No, that’s not true!” In the Bible, God is always telling people what to do. God told Abraham to go to the land that He would show him. God told Noah to build the ark. God told Joshua to attack Jericho. God told the Israelites to obey dozens of commands about what to eat, how to offer sacrifices, and build the Temple. Jesus gave many commands about how we should live. In the Bible, God was all about telling His people to do the right things.

But the Bible also shows that obedience to God can go sideways. Doing the right things without a loving relationship with God is just legalism. It’s being a slave of God instead of a child of God.

Because of the effects of sin in our lives, we often think that we love God mostly by obeying Him:

Jesus said, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. Anyone who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.” (John 15:23-24)

Obedience is indeed important to God. But our obedience is sweetest to Him when it comes from our mutually loving relationship, not just from obligation.

It's About the Relationship

Relationship with Jesus is not just about praying the “sinner’s prayer,” accepting Him as Lord and Savior, and then doing what He says for the rest of our lives. Relationship with Jesus looks a lot like relationship with a human being: sharing joys and griefs, wrestling with difficulties together, having fun together, and getting to know each other’s voice and personality, just because we love each other. A child loves first and then obeys, but a slave obeys in order to earn love or approval.

Jesus even said to His disciples, “Now you are my friends.” (John 15:15)

Not only does Jesus want that kind of intimate relationship with us, so also does the Father. The apostle Paul said we have the privilege of calling the Father “Abba,” which means “Daddy.” (Romans 8:15)

Jesus did life with His disciples. He lived with them for three years. They lost their best friend when Jesus died, not just their Messianic hope.

So also, Jesus wants that back-and-forth, day-to-day relationship with us. He wants to talk with us about what’s important to us and to Him, laugh with us, and touch us to our core with His truth about our value to Him.

After all, the Bible calls Jesus Immanuel, which means “God with us.” (Isaiah 7:10,14. Isaiah 8:8. Matthew 1:23)

Jesus told His followers, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. (Revelation 3:20)

Your relationship with each Person of the Trinity—not just with the Father, but also with Jesus and the Holy Spirit—can be much richer than it is now.

How We Hear God

You might worry as I did, “The only way I feel comfortable hearing from Jesus or God is through the Bible. I’m not sure God still wants to communicate with us today in this back-and-forth conversational way. There’s so much room for error, and I never want to put words in God’s mouth.”

The truth is, you already hear God through your personal experience, not just through the Bible. For examples, you’ve experienced Him speaking to you, through your heart and mind, to do a certain thing or not to do it. You’ve sometimes felt Him prompting you to say something to someone or to pray for someone. At the very least, you felt Him drawing you to Himself when you asked Him to save you. Sometimes you hear God correctly, and sometimes you don’t, but God keeps speaking to you anyway.

We do indeed hear God a lot—but we often think it’s just our own thoughts, so we don’t respond back to Him. Yet, how else is God going to speak to us, but through our hearts and minds?

Jesus even said, “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.” (John 10:27)

When we talk with God, we will indeed sometimes misunderstand what He says. We even do that when we misinterpret what the Bible says. Different Christian traditions interpret the same parts of the Bible differently, so not all can be correct, and yet God blesses them all.

God is God. He is fully capable of enabling us to hear Him, and He gives us grace when we make mistakes. The more we practice talking with Him, the more we grow in our ability to hear Him clearly.

People who have been following Christ for several decades often pursue back-and-forth conversations with God more confidently than others. However, at every age and during every season of our lives, God draws us toward more intimate relationship with Him. I believe—and so do many prominent Christian leaders and theologians—that conversation with God is foundational to Christian life and calling. 

Today? Or Just in Bible Times?

So, about the theology of back-and-forth conversation with God, we cannot absolutely prove from the Bible that God still speaks back-and-forth as specifically to us today as He did in Bible times. But the Bible does not forbid it, and Scriptures such as the ones above strongly point to this kind of uniquely personal relationship with God.

I hope that you now have enough biblical background to consider trying back-and-forth conversation with God. I believe God will confirm its validity to you, via the Holy Spirit’s inner confirmation in your heart, God’s resulting transformation of your life, and even through fulfillment of what God prophesies during your conversations with Him.

Is It Okay to Talk with All Three Persons of the Trinity: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit?

Who the Trinity Is

The questions below will help you start back-and-forth conversations with God:

1. Talk with God about this Bible verse:

“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” (1 John 3:1)

• God, what do you love about me?
• God, what do you feel when you think about me as your daughter/son?
• God, how do you want to show your love to me today?

2. Talk with God about this Bible passage:

Purify me from my sins and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me—now let me rejoice. Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt. Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me. (Psalm 51:7-10)

• God, tell me something about our relationship that would help me to be in conversation with you after I have sinned, or even when I have made up my mind to sin.
• God, what do you want to say to give me peace, comfort, freedom, or significance (or something else) deep in my soul?
• God, what do you want to talk about in conversation with me?
• Here’s what I’d like to talk about in conversation with you. (Ask God your question.

When you read the Bible during your usual devotional time, ask God relational questions—not “doing questions”—about the Bible passage (You might want to review the section in this blog entitled “My First Back-and-Forth Conversation with God.”)

Explore Conversation with the Trinity

Below are some prompts to help you explore conversation with each Person of the Trinity. Many people seem not to hear from the Holy Spirit as much as from the Father and Jesus, although some people hear frequently from all three. Also, some people experience the Holy Spirit more as a strong feeling or sensation instead of as a conversation.

Regardless of your individual experience with Trinity, anyone can develop conversations by addressing God or the Father.

1. God, I’m not sure whether I can or should talk with each Person of the Trinity. 

• What do you personally want to tell me about that? (You might want to review the section of this chapter entitled “Is It Okay to Talk with All Three Persons of the Trinity: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit?”.)

2. Talk with Jesus about this Bible passage: 

On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. (John 2:1-2)

• Jesus, how do you like to have fun with me?
• What additional relational questions do you want to ask Jesus?

3. Talk with the Holy Spirit about this Bible passage: 

“The wind blows where it wishes and you hear the sound of it, but do not know where it comes from and where it is going; so is everyone who is born of the Spirit. (John 3:8)

• Holy Spirit, tell me a time that you spoke to me or moved in my heart.

4. Ask the Trinity questions about this Bible passage: 

“After His baptism, as Jesus came up out of the water, the heavens were opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and settling on him. (Matthew 3:16)

• Father, what did you feel when Jesus was baptized?
• Jesus, what was it like to be baptized by John, your cousin?
• Holy Spirit, how were you present in a uniquely personal way at my own baptism?
• Father, tell me something special about my relationship with you.
• Good morning, Jesus. How are you?
• Holy Spirit, how do you want to be in relationship with me?
• What additional questions do you want to ask the Father, Jesus, or the Holy Spirit?

Keep Growing!

Asking God questions is a great way to start having conversations with Him. But it is not the only way! You can talk with God in the same ways and about the same topics as with a human being—but much more so, and at a much deeper level. In fact, I believe you will be surprised at how marvelously approachable God is, and how eager He is to hang out with you!

Below are some pointers for how to keep growing your conversations with God:

• Start your conversation by saying, “Good morning, God!” Listen for how He responds.
• Tell God what’s on your mind and heart today, and listen for His response.
• Tell God how you feel when you hear Him responding back to you.
• Tell God about something you’re looking forward to doing, and listen for His response.
• Share with God your joy, sadness, fear, anger, anxiety, or anything else. Listen for His response.
• Talk with God about the people you pray for.
• Confess a sin to God, and ask Him to help you process your thoughts and feelings about it.
• As God transforms your life and calling through conversations with Him, express your heartfelt praise, delight, thanks, etc., to Him.

Have Fun!

Almost thirty years ago, a close friend gave me a coffee mug with caricatures of sheep kicking up their heels and dancing with joy. You can almost hear the Baaaa-lelujah Chorus! Playfully scrawled in wooly yarn across the top of the mug was the jolly exclamation, “May the incredible love of Jesus knock your wooly socks off!”

That is my prayer for you!

Maybe you’ve already discovered how to have transformational back-and-forth conversations with God. Or perhaps this is a totally new, seemingly impossible, or even scandalous concept for you. Regardless of your level of experience with this kind of relationship with God, I believe you’re in for a treat!

Have fun in Godversation with our amazing Lord!