Glory Days

My student years at Carson-Newman University were Glory Days! Halcyon days! I entered my freshman year on top of the world, having just graduated high school as valedictorian with a 4.0 GPA. And I graduated university four years later, again in first place with a GPA of 4.0. But here's the thing. I know you won't believe this, but I didn't even care or pay attention to what my class rank was. 

What made my Carson-Newman years the Glory Days was that I felt totally free and happy to be fully me, completely living out my personal values, excelling in Christian calling roles that I loved, and growing in Christ in phenomenal ways. I loved school, and Carson-Newman was the perfect pie of academic rigor, Christian living, exemplary professors, and wonderful friends.

My years there were like the awesome vistas of the Great Smoky Mountain National Park, where my Chemistry Club hiked three times each year: bright, cristp, invigorating, and limitless. I worked hard. I played hard. Everything went superbly, with no serious challenges. It was like I had the golden touch.

And such wonderful memories!

• Excellent, Christ-following professors with whom I attended worship and sang alto in the choir at the First Baptist Church, directly across the street from my dormitory.
• Dougherty Science Center, with its unique complexity of exciting aromas that still evoke the certainty of God's limitless possibilities. 
• Stokely Dining Hall and memories of standing on cafeteria chairs and singing, with my freshman sisters of Burnett Dorm during Rat Week, "We are the Burnett Rats, and we are number one!"
• Walking to Ginos pizza with my hallmates, acting silly and cracking up. My signature goof-off antic—inexplicably funny to my closest half-dozen friends at the time—was jerking the lids off gigantic garbage cans and yelling "Hello!!!" into their echoing depths!

My Crazy Biochemistry Class at Carson-Newman University
(I'm the one with the teddy bear.)

Lowly Days

But then came graduate school at Vanderbilt University. I managed to get a Ph.D. in chemistry there, but it took six years instead of the normal three. I went from being exceptional to merely average.

After that, I did a post-doctoral research fellowship at Indiana University, where I worked on making potential anti-cancer drugs. To my horror and dismay, my dreams were dashed when I realized I would never very good at scientific research. I wasn't good at it, and I didn't want to spend all my days in a lab. 

But I did love to teach. I went to Bethany College for 15 years, where I taught pre-med and other pre-professional courses such as organic chemistry, biochemistry, and pharmacology. I did much better there, and I even got several awards and grants for innovations in teaching.

But gradually, I got a growing, sinking feeling that I'd somehow missed my calling. Science—especially the wonders of medicine and God's amazing universe—still fascinated me. But what really captured my heart was ministry in the church. 

And then, glory be! I thought God had forever vanquished all fears that I had missed my calling when my church, Crossroads Church in Oakdale, PA, offered me a postion as a Discipleship and Leadership pastor. For five years, I was in holy heaven! I enrolled in a distance-learning three-year program at Bethel Seminary and earned a Master of Arts degree in Transformational Leadership. School again!!! 🙂 What fun!!! And four months after I graduated from seminary, I married my wonderful hubby, Ron!!! Woo-hoo!!!

But almost immediately after graduating from seminary, my church role changed and I experienced some serious but unexplained health problems, forcing my resignation from my pastoral role.

Thankfully, God spoke strongly and clearly to me at a Speak Up Conference in Michigan, led by Carol Kent. I felt strongly called to help people find and fulfill their Christian calling through coaching over the phone. So I got certified through the premier Professional Christian Coaching Institute. But even that was a big let-down in some ways, beacause I went from leading and influencing hundreds of people at a five-campus church to coaching just three individuals over the phone.

At various times during all of these "Lowly Days" years, I felt like I had lost my identity, my close connection with God, my hopes and dreams for my own Christian calling, and even my way forward into real impact in God's Kingdom.

Holy Days

Better Days

Susan Kassem says, "A heart without dreams is like a bird without feathers."

My husband and I live in Florida. Our lanai faces out on a beautifully landscaped pond. We frequently feast our eyes and ears on snowy egrets, blue herons, mockingbirds, mother ducks with babies, and even huge alligators.

For several weeks, one particular juvenile snowy egret has been hanging around our pond. He (or she, I don't know the difference) fascinates me. He saunters around so wistfully, head in the air and turning his long neck this way and that, not looking where he's going, but gazing up at the trees and rooftops as if yearning to hop up there and then take off for glorious destinations unknown. Of course, he can't do that, because he's too young to fly. But oh, he keeps trying. He'll flap up onto our neighbor's patio furniture, and then he'll flap again, trying so hard to make it to the gutter of the house.

But so far, no luck. He never makes any noise of frustration, so I'd love to know what he thinks and feels. But eventually, he'll fly. He'll soar. And then his voice will finally sing praises like all of God's other adult snowy egrets.

And guess what? You might be wistfully gazing up toward your calling, perhaps not even knowing where that is, like the juvenile snowy egret yearning for the heights of the rooftops and clouds. And you might be struggling to get to the next great stage of your calling, just as persistently as the juvenile egret tirelessly flaps his way from the patio furniture to the rooftop and finally beyond. 

The good news is that you WILL get there. Your next Christian calling mountaintop is coming. Don't let the enemy convince you otherwise. Just you wait. You'll see! 

Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles (egrets?!); they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:31)

I'm working on interviewing someone who is in what Tony Stoltzfus calls the Fulfillment Stage of Christian calling, because I know that will encourage and show you an in-the-flesh example of where he is taking you too! So stay tuned to future blogs!

In the meantime, take the steps below to Dream, Grow, and Fly toward God's fulfillment of your Christian calling.